Monday, September 5, 2022

My Great Credit Card Adventure

Has this ever happened to you?

Your credit card is hacked, your bank cancels your card, but unknowingly you still use the card. This happened to me! I got a prescription at the drug store, used my card and the adventure began:

As I put the prescription in my pocket, my credit card was rejected!

The pharmacist, a 60ish, 4-ft, 10-inch, 95-pound female dynamo burst out from behind the protective glass and demanded money.

"We can't take that prescription back," she shouted, "You must pay for it now!"  

Frantically going thru my pockets, I gave her my lunch money and two buttons.

"You come back with the rest," she yelled! Mustering all my courage I said, "Yes mam," in a voice so shrill, it sounded like I swallowed a whistle.

Embarrassed, I called my friend Yanin who said, "If you are thinking of going back you should bring a bodyguard with you, if you want to stay in one piece."

I knew Yanin was right! Because that pharmacist had intimidated me, I wouldn't be comfortable any other way. 

But being broke, I asked if I could borrow her daughter Sofia's dog Lenny, a Chihuahua. He's tiny, but he's better than nothing.

"Lenny will be more than happy to assist with your protection," Yanin replied, "But I’m afraid that due to his size he will be able to only protect you from the knees down."

To feel safe, I had to do more! 

A pet store gladly gave me their obscenity screaming parrot. He stands only 10-inches, but screams like he is 10-feet tall.

Immediately, from my parrot's profanity all my friends and neighbors avoided me. So the parrot and chihuahua were all I needed to reassure me.

When I got my new credit card, with my bodyguards at my side, I paid my bill. 

Should this ever occur again, I am ready! For nobody, not even a drunken sailor, can match my parrot's non-stop vulgarity! 

He and Lenny are a powerful pair and no pharmacist will ever scare me again.

With Love To All - Dick

Co-Writer - Yanin Ontiveros

 

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