An Oceanfront Dream Come True

I live in Southern California, and my dream was always to own an oceanfront home. But when I called my realtor, she said the Southern California coast from Malibu to Santa Monica to Newport Beach is way too expensive. Few people can afford it.

After we hung up, I was very sad thinking my oceanfront dream would never come true. But unexpectedly she called back shouting, “I have just the thing for you! And I’m coming right over to tell you about it!“

Within minutes, she arrived:

“It is right on the ocean front, with miles of unspoiled beaches,” she exclaimed. “The views are fantastic, and the best part, you can buy acres for pennies on the dollar.“

“Where is it,” I asked, my heart beating so fast, I could barely contain myself. 

Dickie, Jr.

Recently, I invested thousands of dollars in an advanced technology toilet from the Japanese firm Toto. Because this toilet was so expensive, I named it in honor of myself, Dickie, Jr.

Dickie, Jr. is a toilet packed with computer chips that perform his many functions and at first, he only spoke in beeps and chirps. Those sounds were easy to hear, and it occurred to me I could teach him to talk.

So, I actively began, and at first had some remarkable results, as he always spoke in a happy tone and I understood everything he said, such as, “How are you today?“

But then he began learning on his own and now loves to be a critic and to gossip. For example, yesterday he said:

The Revival of The Olympic Games

On this date (April 6) in 1896 the modern Olympics resumed in Greece after a 1500-year absence. 241 athletes from 14 nations participated.

The Miracle of Lazarus

According to the Gospel of John, Jesus and Lazarus of Bethany were close friends. So, when Lazarus got sick, his sisters, Mary and Martha appealed to Jesus to help him.

But Jesus did not initially respond because he said, he wanted to reveal God’s glory. 

By the time, Jesus did arrive, Lazarus had been dead for four days, and in his tomb. “If you had been here, my brother would not have died, " a heartbroken Martha told Jesus.

Calm and collected, Jesus replied with a booming voice for everyone to hear, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me will live even though they die.“

It was in that moment, as the crowd watched, the famous miracle, The Raising of Lazarus occurred:

Jesus commanded, “Lazarus, come out!“ And Lazarus came out of his tomb, still wrapped in his burial clothes.

From this miracle, Jesus‘s fame grew dramatically, and he was widely celebrated, but as a result, he was eventually condemned to die by those in authority.

We know what happened to Jesus. But what became of Lazarus? 

New Donald Trump 24 Carat Commemorative Gold Coin

After reading about the new Donald Trump gold coin, I too wished for such an honor. But because of President Trump, the price of gold has skyrocketed, a vote of no confidence from investors around the world.

So, in order for me to have a commemorative coin, mine will have to be made from cheap tin, and could be stamped out by my local punch press operator. The read demand for my coin will not come from collectors, but from people who want to fool parking meters and vending machines.

"Give Me Liberty, or Give Me Death"

On this day in history, March 23, 1775, U.S. Founding Father Patrick Henry gave one of American history's most iconic speeches, to the Virginia legislature. 

Crying out "give me liberty of give me death," he called for the overthrow of British rule, and won the votes of two future U.S. Presidents, George Washington and Thomas Jefferson, helping to set the stage for the American Revolution.  

Ironically:

Trump Land

An Open Letter to the Islamic Republic of Iran.

Dear Officials,

As you have witnessed and been profoundly affected by, the American President launched a war against you and now has no direction to go, except for an unending spiral of violence. He is appealing to the rest of the world to join him but has been rebuffed by everyone but Israel.

Iran and the rest of the world is in desperate need of peace, and on that basis, I propose the following to you: