Rocketing Into Space

In 11 days, the first commercial manned space launch in history will take place. The cost to buy a seat is an astounding $28 million! But before I spend this much money (at the moment money I don’t have), I have some questions for Mr. Bezos, whose space launch this is:

1) Being weightless in space, how do I use the bathroom without soaking myself?

2) Are beverages free? (this relates directly to item number 1)

3) Will you cater to my tastes as a vegetarian? (I'm thinking chocolate cake, and I'll skip the vegetables)

4) How many million miles will my mileage plus account receive?

5) Throughout the flight will there be a tiny child kicking the back of my seat while crying out, “Are we there yet?"

6) Can I bring a therapy animal? (I'm thinking of an uncaged wolverine, in case anyone tries to take my window seat)

With Love To All - Dick

Note: This Fable was co-written by Yanin Ontiveros

Note: Shortly after publishing this story, Jon Barnes told me that the whole flight is just 11 minutes. 11 minutes!!! We will barely have a chance to lower and raise our tray tables, or use the beverage cart.