Money For Santa Claus

"We have more children than ever to build toys for," said Santa to his elves. "And we don't have enough money. I'll need to borrow some."

So Santa went to a bank and requested a loan. "What is your income," asked the banker. "I have no income," replied Santa. "I give away all the toys we make."

"That will never do," answered the banker, adding "You need to get money elsewhere. Have you tried the U.S. military. They have many billions of dollars."

So Santa went to the U.S. military asking for a loan. "We can't spare the money," they replied. "It is all spent making weapons."

"But weapons cause death and destruction," said Santa. "What a terrible use of the money," he added as they walked him out the door.

Meanwhile, Santa's elves setup a "Go Fund Me" account and raised the money they needed. "What a relief," said Santa. "The people I went to had no hearts."

But because of his weapons criticism, the military now saw Santa as a security threat. They wired his home and elves' quarters so they could monitor him.

"We'll lockup Santa so he can never again bring presents to children," said a military man, "as we use our weapons to make this a safe and peaceful world."

With Love To All - Dick