Wednesday, March 1, 2023

Mexican President Discovers An Elf

President Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador discovered a forest spirit similar to an elf, and he has a photo to prove it. Recognizing the interview of a lifetime, I spoke with this elf, named Alf:

DK: No-one has ever seen you before. Why have you now gone public?

Alf: Because I am sick of living such a primitive life. I want to go to Hollywood and make a fortune. Do endorsement deals.

DK: Do you have a family?

Alf: Of course I do! I have a wife and 47 children. That’s another reason I need the endorsement deals.

DK: What will you do with this fame and fortune?

Alf: Buy a house in Beverly Hills, with the money I make from the Elf Beverly Hillbillies TV show I plan to make. And I’ve already promised Andres Lopez Obrador a role.

DK: Do you have any concerns?

Alf: Yes! I plan to complain about all of the paparazzi and other media coverage, even as I endlessly seek it. I don’t want my fans to see too much of me, but I want them to see me everywhere! It is contradictory, but it is a Hollywood tradition.

Dear Readers: 

In a stunning development this morning, Mexico's ruling political party, the PRI has named Alf to become the next president of Mexico!

"Why not?" he reportedly said. "I'm not qualified, but I'm as loveable as a koala bear and great at throwing fiestas! And ladies, I'm single!"

With Love To All - Dick

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