Buster is among the gophers that live in my wife Anne's and my backyard.
Two Saturday nights ago, Buster and his friends threw a loud party, making noise that disturbed the squirrels, chipmunks and other creatures that live in our yard.
This wasn't the first time Buster and his friends had done this, and we were tired of warning Buster to stop.
It was time for action.
So the next day Anne went over to his gopher hole, put her finger around Buster's shoulders and said, "buddy you have to go."
"But where will I go," Buster pleaded to Anne with a tear in his eye. "No-one else will have me."
"I don't know," Anne replied. "You should have thought of that Saurday night."
So with his little head on his chest, and his jaw quivering as he tried not to cry, Buster packed his bags.
Watching this sorrowful scene from the top of her gopher hole in our neighbor's yard was Bonnie, a gopher who had long been attracted to Buster.
"You can live with me," Bonnie called out. "If you can behave yourself."
"I've learned a good lesson from all of this," Buster told Bonnie, as he marched right over to her gopher hole, and unpacked his bags. You'll see."
But last Saturday night Buster threw another big party, disturbing all the creatures in both yards.
The next day, Anne and I heard Bonnie say to him, "buddy you have to go."
"But where will I go," Buster pleaded to Bonnie with a tear in his eye. "No-one else will have me."
"I don't know," Bonnie replied. "You should have thought of that Saturday night."
Just then, we heard the distant voice of Bessie, a gopher who lives two yards away.
"You can live with me," Bessie called out. "If you can behave yourself."
"But what if he doesn't behave himself," I asked Anne as we watched Buster move in with Bessie.
"Don't worry," Anne replied.
"There are gopher holes in every yard in the neighborhood, and plenty of lady gophers determined to change Buster, who they believe they can make into a better man."
"And as you'll see after next Saturday night," Anne said while shaking her head, "Buster's biggest problem is the effort it takes to pack his bags."
Dick
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