Wednesday, April 13, 2022

Talking Mushrooms

Recently, a British scientist announced mushrooms can "talk" to each other, with a vocabulary of about 50 words. 

I read this news in a real newspaper! (See:

This is stunning but true because I then spoke with the mushrooms in my yard. I thought we'd be friends, but their leader Herbie shouted, “We want a dental plan!”

“Why,” I replied. “You don’t have teeth! “What are you”, yelled mushroom Maria, “A cheapskate?” Then they all started to grumble until I agreed to buy a dental plan for them.

Not knowing where to buy a mushroom dental plan, I self-insured their plan only to learn little Tommy needs braces, which is costly.

Which brought us to the next issue, what dentist has the skills to put braces on a mushroom?

In desperation, I turned to my friend Yanin, whose daughter Sophia had just gotten braces, and she referred me to their dentist.

I drove little Tommy to this dentist and got him comfortably seated in the dental chair, but he hasn't been seen since. Rumor is he accidentally left in someone's back pocket. What happened next? 

Holy Pozole! The mushrooms sued me! 

With Love To All - Dick   

A Fable Update: The mushrooms won their lawsuit and now own my home, but thank goodness from now on they'll take care of their own dental issues.

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